Blessings in May

On May 2nd, Fast Sunday, I bore my testimony, and I cried. Nothing new there. Afterwards, when Church was over, the Bishop saw me in the hall and said that the Stake President's morning message at Priesthood meeting was to ALWAYS go with the promptings that they feel, so he was going with a prompting and took me into his office and said I needed a blessing. He was so right. It was such a beautiful blessing, I wish I could remember all he said, but what I do remember was the spirit that filled the room while he pronounced the blessing in the name of the Savior.
Today was another one of those days, only this time I asked my home teacher, Brother John Bradfield, if he could give me a blessing.....I thought it was mostly for my feelings of inadequacy regarding school, and we talked about it briefly....however, during the blessing it was mostly about the Love my Father in Heaven has for me and the blessings I bring to the Whitaker Ward Family and how much I am loved by so many, even those that I don't know about. During this, I was promised retention in my studies in school and in the Gospel. Again, that wonderful spirit filled the room. I hung on every word and felt so much peace in my heart and mind. I felt rested after the blessing, the same way I felt after the Bishop administered a blessing upon me on Fast Sunday.
I don't know WHY I am so blessed because I always feel that I am falling short of what I should be doing or have done and could do. I suppose everyone feels that way in their life at one point or another, I don't know.

Yesterday my grandson, Tyler, graduated from high school, and it broke my heart that I couldn't be there to see it happen. What bothers me is that everyone else in the family was there, except Mom and I. It hurt, hurt more than I can say. I knew this day was coming and I failed to save enough money to make the trip when I could have not paid some bills and gone. There were cheap enough flights WHEN I HAD enough $ to make the plane reservations, but I didn't do it because I thought I would have enough to go when the time came. I didn't. The pain is tremendous and I honestly didn't think it would hurt so much, but it did and does.

Shelby drove back to Texas with Paul's parents. I worry about her being there. Enough said.

I am excited about seeing Kimberly in a couple of weeks, hopefully I will have her room already for her when she gets here and then I'm off to see John (Tompkins) Clement and his wife Phoebe. I am really excited to see him again and meet her.

I need this break